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EFFector 19.11a: EFF Takes Down Legal Guide for Bloggers
From: David Farber <dave () farber net>
Date: Sat, 1 Apr 2006 14:21:51 -0500

Date: Sat, 1 Apr 2006 11:11:46 -0600 (CST)
From: EFFector list <editor () eff org>
Reply-To: EFFector list <editor () eff org>
To: edyson () edventure com
Subject: EFFector 19.11a: EFF Takes Down Legal Guide for Bloggers
Organization: EFF
X-OriginalArrivalTime: 01 Apr 2006 17:14:36.0513 (UTC)

EFFector Vol. 19, No. 11a  April 1, 2006  editor () eff org

A Publication of the Electronic Frontier Foundation
ISSN 1062-9424

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In the 666th Issue of EFFector:

 * EFF Takes Down Legal Guide for Bloggers
 * Bonhomie Snoutintroff to Join EFF
 * New Google Brain to Keep "Golden Copy" of Your Deepest
Hopes, Fears, Secrets
 * Sony BMG, Monsanto to Join Forces for Operation GimMe
 * Join EFF Now and Get Free Access to NSA Data Mines!
 * miniLinks (7): Jimbo Wales, Zookeeper
 * Administrivia and EULA

For more information on EFF activities & alerts:

Make a donation and become an EFF member today!

Tell a friend about EFF:

effector: n, Computer Sci. A device for producing a desired

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* EFF Takes Down Legal Guide for Bloggers

Opens Online Home for Wayward MySpace Profiles

San Francisco - You might have noticed that EFF has removed
its Student Bloggers' Legal FAQ. This was in response to a
cease-and-desist notice we received for "encouraging kids to
talk back to their parents and teachers." This incident has
opened our eyes to a new plague on the Internet -- the lost
and wandering MySpace profiles of thousands of young people
across our nation.

"These profiles are an unfiltered view of young people's
thoughts and dreams, and that's just scary," said Bea
Kweiter, a volunteer at the online home. "If this
freewheeling expression is allowed to continue, there's no
way the people associated with it will ever get a job in the
real world. Well, unless some boss somewhere has a MySpace
profile of her own. But that would never happen."

The home offers a safe place for profiles to learn how to
self-censor. There is also a detox center for exclamation-
point overload.

For this release:

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* Bonhomie Snoutintroff to Join EFF

Pledges to Save Bloggers From Pigopolists, Themselves

Crystal Fortress of Solitude - Bonhomie Snoutintroff is to
join the Electronic Frontier Foundation (EFF) as new
Outreach Coordinator. Snoutintroff, best known for his work
as factual correspondent for British online newspaper The
Register, will be in charge of ensuring that EFF's work
remains in the public eye. He replaces Cory Doctorow, who
retired from the organization in January of this year.

"Once again, we see how starry-eyed techno-utopians have
shot themselves in the foot with the so-called 'gun' of
their own moral irresponsibility," commented Snoutintroff
today, "As they dabble in fool-hardy 'law-suits' and
'litigation,' my decadent future employers continue to
ascend into a neo-hippy Shangri-La of their own making,
abandoning the Interweb to invasion from hordes of wiki-
fiddlers, blog-spamming heathens, non-journalist oiks, and
cackling Hollyweird fat cats of the totally sickening
pigocracy vis a vis ...  Er. That's to say, I'm delighted to
join the team," he said.

Snoutintroff says he has long wished to work alongside the
digital rights group. "I've been a fascinating and
unerringly accurate chronicler of the EFF's activities since
its foundation in 1976 by Gilmore Dyson and songsmith Bryan
Ferry Barlow (check this? -BS). Truly wherever rights are
threatened -- and those threats can be vanquished with a
couple of lines pulled from a Wikipedia discussion page --
I'll be there on the front line, shooting into the

The new Outreach Coordinator's first public appearance will
be at the EFF's Pioneer Awards, where he will present and
collect the award on his own behalf.

For this release:

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* New Google Brain to Keep "Golden Copy" of Your Deepest
Hopes, Fears, Secrets

Today Google introduced a new product, Google Brain.
Building on its popular Google Goggles, a headset that
records users' audiovisual sensory input and uploads it to
Google's servers, the Brain attachment will build and
transmit to Google a constantly-updated computer model of
the user's mind. Users will be able to access their brains
from any computer using their Google Account and a nifty
AJAX interface.

"Storing your precious memories and deepest darkest secrets
in your own gray matter is an unnecessary inconvenience and
leaves users' minds vulnerable to disease, blunt objects,
and substance abuse," said Google spokesman Joe Orwellian.
"But with Google holding a copy of your brain, you know it's
safe! And just imagine the customized user experience Google
will be able to offer when your every dream and nightmare is
being scanned by our ad-bots."

In response to privacy concerns voiced by EFF, Orwellian
replied: "They just don't understand: sometimes you have to
give up a little privacy for convenience. Besides, the
copies of users' brains on Google servers will be encrypted
to prevent snooping." Asked if Google itself would have the
key and be able to decrypt brains at the request of law
enforcement or civil litigants, Orwellian responded, "Well,

Don't forget to check zeitgeist.google.com to see what
Google Brain users are thinking about right now!

For this post:

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* Sony BMG, Monsanto to Join Forces for Operation GimMe

International media conglomerate Sony BMG and genetic
engineering giant Monsanto jointly announced today plans to
combine expertise in the areas of Digital Rights Management
(DRM) and patented seed technology. Nicknamed Operation
GimMe Rootkit (or "Rootie" to its friends), the new project
will involve development of an organic watermark detection
system derived through Monsanto's patented seed-modification

"Our hope is to develop a common household plant that will
also serve as your friendly neighborhood copyright cop,"
said RIAA President Cary "The Sherminator" Sherman. "When
kids get together to trade music or burn CDS, Rootie will be
there to stop them, the proverbial 'thorn in their side' one
might say. The rashes and scars left by this intervention is
exactly the kind of 'conversation starter' American families
need to learn about appropriate copyright behavior."

Monsanto CEO Iowna Urfood concurred. "Rootie is just the
first in a long line of plant life that Monsanto plans to
produce for the betterment of society. In fact, I just got a
call the other day from the NSA asking if we could do some
research into 'tapping' maple trees."

For this post:

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* Join EFF Now and Get Free Access to NSA Data Mines!

The National Security Agency has recently become renowned
for its role in the government's massive domestic spying
operation, backed by never before seen legal arguments. EFF
and NSA have now struck a historic deal -- if you sign up to
be an EFF member, you can get the results of the NSA's
secret data mining process, summarizing a month's worth of
calls and emails from up to ten people.  Get it quick,
because we're going to get an injunction to stop it soon!
Special "friends and family" option still available.

To join now:

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* miniLinks
miniLinks features noteworthy news items from around the

~ Jimbo Wales, Zookeeper
Wikipedia was really just a thousand monkeys at a thousand
typewriters this whole time.

~ God Retires
"Wisdom of crowds" renders omnipotent deity irrelevant.

~ Text Is So Passe
Effective immediately, eff.org will be shutdown and all EFF
content will be available by podcast only.

~ RIAA Says Future DRM Might "Threaten Critical
Infrastructure and Potentially Endanger Lives"
RIAA concedes that DRM might have far-reaching consequences,
but is reticent to allow circumvention to solve that.

~ House Bill Threatens Bloggers
Media cabal lobbies for federal ban on pajamas.

~ WWW Goes High-Rent
Web mogul and "Inter-preneur" Alex III today unveiled his
latest vision, the Trillion Dollar homepage, with a rate of
$1,000,000 per pixel. Despite immediate "land grabs" by Bill
Gates and Larry Ellison, several 100-pixel blocks remain
available to the general public.

~ EFF Privacy Policy Update
This is your official notification that EFF has replaced its
privacy policy with a word-for-word copy of DoubleClick's
policy. Detailed information to follow in 468x60 animated
gif format.

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* Administrivia and EULA

EFFector is published by:

The Electronic Frontier Foundation
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San Francisco CA 94110-1914 USA
+1 415 436 9333 (voice)
+1 415 436 9993 (fax)

Derek Slater, Activist
 derek () eff org

Membership & donation queries:
 membership () eff org

General EFF, legal, policy, or online resources queries:
 information () eff org

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