IP: Political Diversity 101 -- You have two cows ...

[Dave Farber <farber () central cis upenn edu>]

From: EdgarSuter () aol com


Subject: unadulterated humor with redeeming social value


Friends, with passage of the "Tyranny Triumphs over Terrorism" bill this
week, there was little respite in our struggle to rain blows on the
counter-revolutionaries destroying Jefferson's dream.  The following was
forwarded by a good friend.  I thought I'd pass it on to you, my brothers and
sisters in liberty, while I am still laughing.  Edgar
**********************************************
Economic and Political Theory 101




FEUDALISM
 =========
    You have two cows.  Your lord takes some of the milk.


 PURE SOCIALISM
 ==============
    You have two cows.  The government takes them and puts
 them in a barn with everyone else's cows.  You have to take
 care of all the cows.


    The government gives you as much milk as you need.


 BUREAUCRATIC SOCIALISM
 ======================
    You have two cows.  The government takes them and puts
 them in a barn with everyone else's cows.  They are cared for
 by ex-chicken farmers.


    You have to take care of the chickens the government took
 from the chicken farmers. The government gives you as
 much milk and eggs the regulations say you should need.


 FASCISM
 =======
    You have two cows.  The government takes both, hires you
 to take care of them, and sells you the milk.


 PURE COMMUNISM
 ==============
    You have two cows.  Your neighbors help you take care of
 them, and you all share the milk.


 RUSSIAN COMMUNISM
 =================
    You have two cows.  You have to take care of them, but
 the government takes all the milk.


 CAMBODIAN COMMUNISM
 ===================
    You have two cows.  The government takes both and
 shoots you.


 DICTATORSHIP
 ============
    You have two cows.  The government takes both and drafts
 you.


 PURE DEMOCRACY
 ==============
    You have two cows.  Your neighbors decide who gets the
 milk.


 REPRESENTATIVE DEMOCRACY
 ========================
    You have two cows.  Your neighbors pick someone to tell
 you who gets the milk.


 BUREAUCRACY
 ===========
    You have two cows.  At first the government regulates what
 you can feed them and when you can milk them.  Then it
 pays you not to milk them.  Then it takes both, shoots one,
 milks the other and pours the milk down the drain. Then it
 requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing
 cows.


 PURE ANARCHY
 ============
    You have two cows.  Either you sell the milk at a fair price
 or your neighbors try to take the cows and kill you.


 LIBERTARIAN: ANARCHO-CAPITALISM
 ===============================
    You have two cows.  You sell one and buy a bull.


 SURREALISM
 ==========
    You have two giraffes.  The government requires you to
 take harmonica lessons.